Emotional day

First, The cardinal's nest is empty. Whatever predator took the last egg and the hatchling left no trace. I am very sad.

But most importantly,

Today was Owen's summer celebration at school. It was his last day of preschool ... ever. I woke up very emotional from a night filled with weird nightmares and stayed emotional all day. I cried during the little slideshow of the kids preschool class and though I gathered myself up at the end of it, I completely lost it while trying to give the teachers their end of the year gift. What a freakin' mess I was.
There were a few interesting moments for exemple when Ty was the first one out of the playground to go back into the classroom. He dutifully follows the little brick wall (as Owen has been doing at school for the last 2 years) and reaches the door knob to the building first. Owen arrives a few seconds later trying to also open the door. Ty looks at Owen with fire in his eyes and yells to him: "NO!!! I OPEN THE DOOR!!! THIS IS MY SCHOOL NOW!!" ... Hmmm WOW! Owen could only answer one thing to that "well, I wanna open it, it's still MY school for now" ... but I could see he was a little surprised by Ty's possessive reaction ... as was I, to say the least.

I love the fact that Ty has no issue with this new transition. Owen doesn't seem to have a problem with it either. They are both ready to move on to different things. They are growing. Sometimes, I feel like I am stuck in the same place. I want them to stay at Woodend forever so I can have the benefit of being there. It was harder for me to say goodbye to the teachers today than it was for Owen. I can't imagine not seeing them and sharing a few minutes of chit chat with them every morning. Thankfully, Ty will be there to support my selfish socializing for the next to years.

This school has been an extension of our family for 2 years now. As I was telling my friend Jen tonight (who told me to mention this in the blog), I believe kids need boundaries to contain the immense freedom I feel I give them. Audubon Nature Preschool provides that to my kids as we do at home.
The image I always use to describe this ... the way I help my kids grow ... is that of a large open field.
If someone dropped you in the middle of nowhere, in a large field without boundaries, wouldn't you feel completely lost and sacred? Scared enough that you might not want to explore this wild open space by fear of something happening, fear of being more lost than you were to start with?
Now imagine that same field but this time, you notice a non intrusive fence all around, far away in the distance. Isn't that a bit more reassuring? Wouldn't you feel secure in knowing that no matter what, you can roam and explore but you'll always find your way back?
That's the way I hope to help my boys grow and live. Lots of freedom, lots of space to discover but I'll always be there to help them find their way.

Owen tends to run around this open field and shakes the fence once in a while to make sure it's strong.
Ty seems to be intent on climbing over ... I might need an electric fence ... (ok, I'm just kidding : ) )